"not suicidal, just overwhelmed"

So I was procrastinating studying and decided to check my blog. I saw a comment that was written on my last post, that made me realize it really has been forever since I've posted. So I decided to catch everyone (if anyone) who reads this blog up with my oh so exciting life...so what has been up with me...school is going great. I am in the middle of my second year of pharmacy school at Samford, and I love it. It is harder than anything I've ever done in my life. I study more than I sleep, but it is very rewarding and even fun at times. I moved out of my apartment in southside and am now in a house with some of my classmates (4 other girls and two dogs to be exact). When I tell people this sometimes they freak out; FIVE girls in one house. How do yall get along with all that estrogen? And honestly, I haven't ever experienced much else. I mean, that's what I grew up with. For 18 years of my life I lived with my mom, three sisters, and numerous cats (most of which were female). I absolutely love not being in an apartment. It is so nice to come home to a real house after a long day. Every now and again I do miss living by myself, but for the most part, I enjoy having housemates. I am still working like a crazy person; I am still singing at Trinity, working at UAB on my breaks from school, working at Walgreens during school, and have recently started doing a lot of babysitting. It makes for a pretty hectic schedule, but hey, that's what I thrive in. I'm also dating a wonderful guy. He's a yankee, so it makes for some interesting times, but it's great. Overall, life is amazing. When I started college I would have never guessed that at 25 my life would be where it is now, but honestly I wouldn't want it any other way. I have found out more about myself than I ever thought possible and am constantly discovering more of the person that I want to become. This past year, while difficult, has been a complete blessing, and I thank God everyday for what I have in my life and what I see ahead in my future...now I am going to try and post more often, so I will give you a short recap of this year so far...January we were out of classes, I had my second rotation for school (paying tuition to work for free, not that cool). I as placed at a small hospital in Birmingham. It was so different from the atmosphere that I am used to at UAB and reminded me a lot of my time at Baptist in Jackson. I learned a lot and enjoyed it, for the most part. I have always thought that it is important to get different perspectives on everything, and working at a smaller hospital where things are done so differently really allowed me to see new things, and appreciate other things that I may take for granted at UAB (where I have been for the past 5 years). Classes started up shortly after I finished the rotation this past month, and people were not lying when they said that this would be my hardest semester. We are about one month into the classes and I am completely overwhelmed. I am learning a lot, but sometimes I just feel like it is too much. I have a lot of friends (in addition to my parents) that have already graduated and are working as pharmacists, and I love their support. They all tell me that I WILL get through it and it will be all worth it in the end. I look at them as examples and know that they are right and I will survive the next years ahead of me. Yesterday was our first test of the semester, MED CHEM. While I was always good at chemistry in undergrad, med chem is a horse of a different color. Maybe it's the teachers, maybe it's the vast amount of seemingly useless information, or maybe again, it's just the teachers, but this class is truly my downfall. I studied it for countless hours and after taking the test just wanted to shoot myself, but I have learned that I just have to keep working and move to the next test. Next week, infectious disease, a class I enjoy. One of the reasons I enjoy this one so much is that I can see it's application when I work at the hospital. When I can sit in class and learn about a treatment for a certain bug and then a little light goes off and i remember, "oh yeah, that's what that patient had, and hey, that's how it was treated, and it workd!" It really reminds me of why I am doing all of this hard work. I can't wait to graduate and do this everyday!....okay, now it's late and I have class t/m morning, so I probably should go to sleep. I will try to post again next week, maybe even get back into my old habit of posting more regularly. Good night all!