sisters

this weekend i got to spend time with all of my sisters...this is me, amanda, and becca...we had been swimming all afternoon so we may not look our best, but it was great to spend time together, well when we werent fighting, after all, somethings never change...

is this what i am coming home too???

i went home this weekend, and my most memorable moment would have to be the one where i met the new family pet...he frequents my backyard, eats the cat's food, and is not scared away easily...but isnt he cute, any name suggestions?

my most recently purchased new favorite and most used object....my lapdesk...yes i am a loser, i use it all the time...it is wonderful, i can now sit on my couch and study in comfort...i can spread out all of my junk and get things done...i feel so much more efficeint...gosh i am a dork, arent i?

so i visited with copeland today, which in itself is always an experience, and guess what we talked about...well, all of you that have been keeping up with the choir blog probably have a really good guess, now dont get me wrong, that is not all we talked about, i also updated him on my plans for the next year, and we discussed some of the upcoming plans of the choir (sniff sniff)...but the whole marriage conversation really stuck with me...the thing, i mean, that stuck with me is how i participated in this conversation, you see if you had heard my conversations on the subject three years ago it would be a totally different subject, and well, it kinda suprised me when i really stepped back and listened to myself today...anyway this all has prompted me to shed a little light on the "other perspective"...see all i have been hearing on this matter is people's opinions, and generally these opinions are nothing but that...most of the people talking about this subject in our social rehlm have a completly different view than the people who have been there...granted there are many people, and many of my firends from highschool that are happily married, the continuation of this post is not at all to say that young marriages dont work (b/c in many cases they do), the following is a look into the mind, heart, and soul of someone who has lived the argument that we have all been having, but this argument is internal:

"well, you just don't understand...we are in love and that is just not going to change. i mean what do you know. i have grown up so much in my first year of college, i think that i know better than anyone else, what i want in my life and how i want it to happen. we are so great together, i just can't imagine my life without him, and i just know that it is not going to change. i know that it wil be hard...im not stupid, but by this is going to work. i...we are going to make it work, i just know that this is God's will......."

"hm,that was strange, its never bothered me before, oh well.im better

now..."

"okay, this is not exactly what i had planned. im supposed to be in this place, things should be certain, i dont really know what...no, its okay, we can work though it, its not a big deal, it just me being stupid...we will make this work, after all its just a minor detail..."

"have i always felt this way about this subject...i cant remember, well yeah, its what i was taught, but i dont know if i feel the same way about it now...its seems so different"

"okay, take a breath, what have i done, i dont know if this is right, i mean, i shouldnt feel like this, right? it should be the other way, not this way, is this right, am i righ . . .stop it, stop it, your just not trying hard enough...dont cry, now then go back, your just being silly...you have to make this work"

"im in too deep, there is no turning back...it doesnt matter what i feel like sometimes, its all in my head...ok, ok, ok...im just nervous, other times its great...plus, well, its too late, suck it up...youve made my bed and you have to lie in it...the end"

"there is no one would understand, no one...it would ruin everything, my entire life if i, and his, and i cant, i am right, all those people who said it wouldnt work, they arent right, i am...you know, i just cant, i have to go through with it..."

"i cant....."

"okay, here goes........"

almost two years later...and well, i am still alive, and you know what i am more alive than ever...my experience helped shape me into who i am today, so i cant have any regrets, and you know what....i dont

so, one definite plan for the upcoming future...taking the MCAT...oh and it will remain official b/c i just forked over the money to take it...i figure God is giving me this year for a reason, why not weigh all of my options and knock on every unlocked door...i know i want to help people and i love medicine...so next logical choice, being a doctor...im going to see how i do on the test and apply to a few medical schools, in addition to a good number of pharmacy schools...surely with alot of open doors one will have to be right for me...

well, it's over...i got an email today telling me that i have been taken off the waiting list, so that door is closed...now i look forward, but everything is just blurry, but ya know what...maybe blurry isn't so bad, yes i like structure and definition, but maybe this is what i need...God is using this experience to teach me something, and i just have to be patient and keep my eyes open...i will learn from this and i will grow as a person...i move home in about three weeks, i have put in applications to the hospital that my mom works at and i am waiting on my acceptance letter from hinds (the local junior college)...ill work full time, take a couple of classes, save some money, and open a few more doors for myself...it will definitely be a growing experience, and i am trying my hardest to be thankful for it...

happy fourth of july!!! this is what we did tonight (this is not us, i forgot my camera), we walked to homewood park, had a picnic with bbq, and laid on the grass while watching the fireworks over red mountain...it was great, sure beats last year when i watched them from the hospital...there were so many families at the park, it made me feel like we were a family (i know, i know im getting too girly)...anyway, i need to try to get some rest i have to be back at work at 630 in the morning...i sure hope the kids stop celebrating with fireworks (they are right behind my bedroom window)...oh well, good night all

girls night

this is all the girls out on the town, no boys!!!

being lazy

ever wonder what it would be like to be a cat?...somedays i wish that i could just trade places with my girls for just a few days...this is how my girls spend the majority of their day, being lazy in their beds...aren't they beautiful...

hawaiian shirts, flip flops, jimmy buffett music, and even margaritas (well non-alcoholic)...sounds like i was at the beach, but no...i was at church...it's a new series at the contemporary service at my church and it is really great, i was only able to attend the end of it (b/c i had to sing in "big church")...one of our new ministers, wade, has started this new series "The Gospel According to Jimmy Buffett" i was really interested to see how this could be turned around into a sermon, and when i heard it, the message not only impressed me, but also moved me...it was so applicable to where i am right now, and i feel that as the weeks go one it is going to get even better...so if any of you are interested i really recommend just trying it out, youll never listen to Jimmy Buffett the same again

unofficially official

well, that about explains it...i got an email the other day saying that all applicants offered a seat at ole miss accepted their seats, so unless something bad happens to one of them (which i do not want) ill be in jackson in 6 weeks...but ya know what, it wont be that bad...my mom is busy right now with my sisters and trying to sell her house so i know i will be a big help, and i can take just a few classes, ya know take it easy, and concentrate on other things, itll be good for me to take it easy for a year or so...and next year ill apply at several schools, who knows i could be back next summer getting ready to go to samford, which is sounding kinda good right now...anyway i have no idea where i will be but i do know that whatever or where ever it is, it is what i should be doing, after all i am not the one that plans these things....i leave you with a song:

Hard as it seems

Standing in dreams

Where is the dreamer now

Wonder if I

Wanted to try

Would I remember how

I don't know the way to go from here

But I know that I have made my choice

And this is where I stand

Until He moves me on

And I will listen to His voice

This is the faith

Patience to wait

When there is nothing clear

Nothing to see

Still we believe

Jesus is very near

I can not imagine what will come

But I've already made my choice

And this is where I stand

Until He moves me on

And I will listen to His voice

Could it be that He is only waiting there to see

If I will learn to love the dreams that He has dreamed for me

Can't imagine what the future holds

But I've already made my choice

And this is where I stand

Until He moves me on

And I will listen to His voice

ONE YEAR!!!

yes that is right, charles and i celebrated our anniversery today (well we actually celebrated last night b/c we both worked tonight)...it was great, we grilled out salmon and shrimp and just spent some quality 'us' time together, i couldnt have asked for anything better...this year has flown by, it's kinda scary to know that ill be leaving in 8weeks, but enough about that...it has been a wonderful and amazing year, and i can only pray that the following years are as wonderful as the first...

i am in love with the most wonderful man ever...and it is great!!!

gosh it has been busy, sorry i havent posted in a while, but after my last post i was kinda down (if you couldnt tell)...so after that post i decided to try not to think about the fall too much, ive succeded slightly...everyone is constently telling me dont plan too much, enjoy your life, and all that stuff, but let me let you in on a little secret, planning is my distraction...you see if i am constently thinking about pharmacy school and my educational career i dont have to spend time realizing that i am about to leave what has now become my home...i think, i just think of my life in terms of school so that i dont have to think in terms of, well, my life...do not get me wrong, i am living and taking every moment to enjoy each opportunity that i get, but its nights like tonight, when i have the best time enjoying my life and all that it encompasses, that it hits me...less than ten weeks left, then its time to start over, establishing myself and my actions (not recreating, just restablishing regardless to where i am)...and well, i lose it...when everything is fast paced, hurried, and exciting, i honestly dont have any down time, but if i have just a moment of silence allowing my brain to drift i get "enjoy this while it lasts, it wont be much longer" and i just dont want to think about that, i want to keep myself from realizing that in about two months i will be off...so maybe that can explain my actions and words...i guess i think that if i keep concentrating on the plan and the ultimate future by working hard now then i dont have to think about the immediate future sitting at my doorstep...
(and for the people who keep telling me to enjoy each moment, dont worry, i am more than youll know)
ps...this was not meant as a 'down' post, i am extremely happy, this is just a small look into my thoughts and justifications...

the theme of my life...

okay, so i feel like there is a common theme occurring in my life...like in every aspect, in everything that i try to do this theme comes back to bite me in the.., well you know...so what is it, ill try to explain in without a diagram, it might be hard...imagine this, there is this scale (not to weigh, but to measure) and it goes from 0 - 10, everyone sets there own expectations for themselves and the world has expectations for everyone, so let's say that the world expectation for everyone in a 6, and in my case, my expectations for myself is a 10, i truly feel deep in my being that i am able obtain a 10, but here is the catch...while i am always striving for success in everything i can never get past a 9, it doesn't matter how hard i work, or how bad i want it i can not break my 9 point ceiling...this happens all the time, here are just a few examples: my music (personally, solo i mean), my grades (okay but not great), and now in general, the plans for my life, translation, pharmacy school (i found our this weekend that i am on the waiting list for ole miss)...so here it is, in everything i feel like the world is shouting to me in a slightly mocking way, "ha,ha...you thought you had it, you did the very best you could but ya know what, your best is just a little short of great...enjoy being average, delia charest"....and you know what, it just sucks....

i am taking the first step, admitting i have an addiction...

yes that is right, i am going to admit to you all that i am addicted...some of you are asking "what could delia possibly be addicted to", the other of you are saying "its about time she admit it" so here goes...

"I DELIA CHAREST AM ADDICTED TO NUTELLA"

there i feel better already...i discovered my new love while being in France, everyone was like, "try it, try it" and i am now blaming my addiction on everyone of you, especially Katie Mo and Maggie (but secretly i am thanking God for allowing you to open my eyes)...luckily, the only place near me that my love is sold is Winn Dixie, and honestly the Winn Dixie near my house is scary, and i won't go without anyone else, and there is no way that Charles will contribute to my addiction, he already believes that i am beyond help, so i am probably going to be exploring this "cold turkey" thing, i am not looking forward to it...but oh well, i am not going to think about that now... im going to eat dinner now, hmmm....what to eat, what to eat....

the real world stinks, take me back to Paris

so back in America, what have i been doing...workings, yuck!!! i haven't even unpacked yet, part of this is due to work, but i think the other part deals with the hope that i can just pick up and go back...hmmmm, why do i think that i feel this way, easy, i am in a transition period right now, note about delia, she doesn't like change, especially when she has no idea what the transition holds, yes that is correct, still no word...my friend that i work with at uab has applied also and he called this past week, they told him that the decision will be made this coming week, and students will be notified the next week, two more weeks, aghhhhhhhh....i just want to know so i can decidewhat i am going to do, i hope i get for many reasons, but right now i hope i g et in so that i do not have to make the decision of where to move, do i move home or do i stay here, work and find a roommate, i know what i should do, but i want with all of myself to do the other, i just want to know, but i will pass on knowing if i can catch a flight back to Paris, thats a fair trade right? well i probably should get ready for church...

ps. i am really ready for my body to get used to central time again, not being able to sleep past 730 is really beginning to get annoying, i mean i am out blogging even copeland, thats just wrong

i wanna go back....

more...

so there were many things that i looked forward to on this trip to France, but the most powerful aspect of the entire trip was something that i had not even considered to be a factor in the trip, what was is...GOD...now dont get me wrong, i knew that it was a blessing that i was even getting the opportunity to go on such a wonderful trip, and i was constantly asking for a safe trip...but i saw God in ways that i had never even thought of discoveing Him on this trip...of course through the music i am always thinking of Him and how my voice can be used as His instrument and i often feel His presence when i am singing, but throughout this trip, He revealed Himself in amazing ways, obviously through our music, but it was every concert...the first Notre Dame: there were times when i had to stop singing and fight back the tears b/c of utter awe i was feeling in singing in such a obvious presence of God...

the second the night concert at the little paris church: seeing God's glow in the eyes of our audience, they would not stop clapping until we came back, they said that their parton saint teresa is the saint for desperate people, eveyone told us that usually they would pray to saint teresa for her help with us, but not our choir, they said we were not desperate, and we did not need the saint, it was amazing to see their faith in us after just hearing us for a short period of time...

third saturday night of the compeitition: the concert of my life, selig, lux, and i thank you jesus, all the best we had ever sung, we held the audience in complete awe, and want for more, after lux we could hear the audience breath a sigh when the song was over, and the uproar after we finished i thank you jesus...the response for that audience was amazing, people who could not speak any english came up to us to tell us how we moved them, one precious little french man told us that the spirit was with us, all around us...i truly belive that, yes we sang well, but it was truly God's voice and spirit that these people heard...

other than the music i was also able to expeirence God's amazing creations...looking at the beautiful history that has been around for so long, and so many things have happened in these places, the most obvious were the cathedrals...to think that people had been worshipping in these places for longer than i can fathom is just amazing...and now i can add my name to that long list of people that worshipped in Notre Dame or Chartes...

the scenery was also constantly showing me God...i've always said that when i see the sun peaking through the clouds or around a building, and i can see the individual rays, that i am seeing God...it felt like everytime i turned around i saw this, at Notre Dame, the Eiffel tower it just seemed to be everywhere...

hands down the most amzing nonmusical experience of this trip was when charles and i went back to notre dame to spend some time with God...we lit a candle and said a prayer that He would always bless us and our relationship together, it truly was amazing i really felt His arms around the two of us that day...

there were so many other things that i was able to see glimpses of God and His work through, i could not upload many pictures so here is a link to my yahoo pictures...hopefully you can see some of the glimpses that i so gratefully experienced...

we were so lucky...

WARNNING...this could be considered mushy and girly, read at your on risk...okay so charles and i realized that we were two of the luckiest people on our trip, so many of our friends left their significant others back home in alabama, having to spend countless time and money to communicate, but not charles and i, we got to spend ten amazing days in france, together...we grew closer throughout the entire trip, we got to sing the concerts of our lives together, we got to experience the top of the eiffel tower together, we got to see history together, we learned to navigate the Paris metro system together, we even got to spend 10 hours on a plane together, (that last one was good and bad)...it made me realize even more what a lucky girl i am, and how much i want to continue to experience new things with this, my wonderful boyfriend...here are a few of my favorite pictures of us thoughout the trip...

this is us waiting to board the plane in atlanta...we were so excited and ready to go...

this is us in front of the arc de' triomphe, this was an amazing part of Paris, it was sooo big...

this is us on the boat ride, you can see the eiffel tower behind us, it was so pretty at night when it lit up, absoulutely breath taking

this is us actually on the top of the eiffel tower, that Paris in the backgroud, getting to the top of the tower was scary but once we were up there the view, and my company made it so special...not many people get to expeirence the top of the eiffel tower with the love of their life!!!

this is us right before we left for our banquet on the last night, it was really sad to say goodbye to everyone, but charles was wonderful, he always can help me when i get into my sad moods...

okay, so this is on the bus ride from atlanta to birmingham...we were so sick of traveling, our bodies were exausted b/c at this point with time zone changes we had been up nearly 20 hours at this point, we were sooo tired...
there are so many more pictures...ill post some more later, now i must have a break...